Election? What Election?

     One of the benefits of being at the beach is that you don't see the news. (At least we haven't.) We did hear that the Chicago Cubs beat the Cleveland Indians in the World Series -- in fact, we watched part of the game at a sports bar in town -- but other than that we have not turned on the TV in two weeks, except to view one episode of "Madam Secretary" on Netflix.

     So it was a surprise when we woke up this morning to find that we were supposed to turn back the clocks last night. And also, that the election is only two days away!

     I am not a fan of Donald Trump. He is vulgar, crass, obnoxious and narcissistic. In other words, he is emblematic of a particular type of American. He's the loud, obnoxious fraternity brother. He's the aggressive driver with a souped-up engine and purple lights shining on oversized tires and high suspension. Or, as I read somewhere, he reminds many women of the guy they once dated who was pushy, overbearing, sexually aggressive and completely full of himself and nobody else.

     The liberals and the media are beside themselves about Donald Trump, and they call him -- and those who support him -- all kinds of nasty names. According to a lot of people I know, Trump voters are a bunch of racist, ignorant yahoos. Liberals seem to think that they score points by being more anti-Trump than the next person, and there's more than a hint of class bias in their attacks.

     Liberals fear what will happen if Trump wins -- although I think they are just trying to scare people into not voting for Trump. The pundits suggest that gun-toting Trump supporters will claim the election was stolen and they will riot in the streets. But the fact is, I've heard of more Trump campaign signs being defaced and torn down than Clinton signs being vandalized by Trump supporters.

     I actually think it's amazing that despite Trump's obnoxious behavior, and despite his vilification by all but the most conservative media, he still garners support from more than 40 percent of the American public. Support for Trump somehow goes way beyond the angry old white males who resent the loss of their so-called favored status in society.

     It's also ironic that the media have turned so vehemently against Donald Trump. Because they are the ones who created him in the first place, by paying attention to his antics, his outrageous statements, his blatant attempts to manipulate media outlets as they reached for ratings and ad dollars.

     Honestly, the only reason why I am not beside myself about Donald Trump is that I don't think he's going to win. He consistently runs behind Clinton in virtually every poll. The electoral map favors Clinton who starts out with an electoral advantage and seems to be winning most of the battleground states, from Colorado to Florida, from Pennsylvania to Maine. And the stock market is predicting a Clinton win, since it's gone down a little bit in nervous trading, but nothing like the swoon it likely would suffer if it really expected a Trump victory.

     To be honest, I'm not a big Clinton fan either, because she's too much the political hack and not enough the inspirational leader. But I'd take her over Trump any day. As for hoping for someone better, I'll fall back on what Cleveland fans must be saying:  just wait till next time.

     Liberals are in a panic about  a possible Trump victory. But what would really happen in the unlikely event that Trump does win? Honestly, I don't know. Except I'd hope that an obstructionist Congress would stop Trump in his tracks, and therefore we'd have the same do-nothing government we've had for the past four years. So if Trump wins, I'd think after an initial shock, not as much as you'd think would really change in America.

     What will happen if Clinton wins, as I expect? There will not be riots in the streets. That's just professional paranoia. Instead, I agree with the pundits and critics who say business will be done as usual, with a continuation of traditional self-dealing and political favors. What I hope is that Clinton and the Democrats will not dismiss and ignore the 40 percent of Americans who supported Trump. Because . . . do you really think that 40 percent of the American public is racist, homophobic and misogynistic?

     I hope the new administration will see that those "deplorables" have a lot of legitimate complaints about politics as usual, and I'd urge the new (old) leaders to address a lot of their concerns, from lost wages to lost jobs, lost opportunities, and the loss of a way of life.

     Of course, I realize that I have just opened myself up to the possibility of looking pretty stupid in a few days. Maybe I've just had too much sun, and not enough news, in the last two weeks. I should reveal some of my previous political predictions. I predicted that they would never get Nixon. I said Reagan was too conservative, he'd never get elected. And I predicted that Bill Clinton could never win a second term.

     After that I gave up forecasting for a while. But it just seems to me everyone is in such a state of hysteria that they need a voice of reason, a dose of common sense. Besides, maybe this time I'll be right. Even the Chicago Cubs win one once every hundred years or so.