"An empty man is full of himself." -- Edward Abbey

Sunday, December 22, 2013

The Theory of Time

     This is a short post because it's Christmas, and the kids are coming to visit, and I just don't have the time.

     Which got me thinking about the relativity time. I had dinner with some old friends the other night, and we started reminiscing about some old colleagues, some old music, some old events, and nobody could recall exactly when anything happened.

     At which point my friend Bill offered up his Theory of Time:

     If you think something happened five years ago, it actually happened eight years ago. If you think it was ten years ago, it was actually 15 years ago. And if you think something occurred 20 years ago, it really happened 30 years ago.

     And that brings up Tom's Corollary:

     The corollary covers the age of your children. When your son or daughter is two years old, you think they are two years old. When they're five, you think they are five. But by the time they turn ten, the slippage of time begins to kick in:  When they're ten, you think they are eight. Then when they're 15, you think of them as 12. When they turn 20, you think they're 15.

     When they're 25, you think they're still 17. When they're 30, you still think they're 17.

     Maybe it changes when you get grandchildren. I don't know. I don't have grandchildren. But I do have a 30-year-old daughter. And if you ask me, I would swear ... she's 17.


DJan said...

He's got a good theory going on there. I think it's quite accurate! Merry Christmas to you and yours, Tom. Be sure to eat just the right amount and drink just a bit more than that! :-)

Olga said...

That sounds about right to me.

stephen Hayes said...

My mother still thinks I'm ten. I may have given her cause to think this.

Dr. Kathy McCoy said...

I think it's a matter of them always being children to their parents -- and members of the parental generation. You're so right about the time slippage.
When I was in my fifties and Aunt Molly was in her eighties, she used to tell me "As long as I'm around, you're still a kid, kiddo!"

Meryl Baer said...

I think you have 'discovered' an important and true theory about life.
Merry Christmas!

Anonymous said...

Take me back oh time in thy flight,

Linda Myers said...

Yep. We're taking our bicycles to Tucson for the winter. We haven't ridden in three years. I looked back and we have had them for EIGHT YEARS. How could that be?

Dick Klade said...

Intriguing. Could be; our 50-something son really is 21 Knew it all along.

Happy holidays!