The Halloween Monster

     Over the weekend B and I took a trip over to Costco to stock up on paper towels, toilet paper, coffee, cereal, a few pounds of chicken and . . . Halloween candy.

     Halloween candy? Do you think I'm jumping the gun?

     Of all the holidays on the calendar, it's Halloween that I prepare for the farthest in advance. Not in terms of a costume or decorations. But you know, you can't take the chance that they'll run out of candy. And with all the risks associated with razors in the apples and LSD in the junior mints, you can't be too careful. So I take it upon myself to taste-test each batch of candy. Really . . . I do it for the kids!

Ready for Halloween

     My favorite is Kit Kat. I also like M&Ms -- the ones with peanuts -- and Hershey bars with almonds.

     But remember, I'm not doing this for myself. I'm doing it for the kids.

     So what's your favorite candy? Do you have one? I know a lot of people lose their sweet tooth as they get older. Their tastes become more sophisticated, and they take just a small half-teaspoon of sugar in their tea, and don't put any sugar on the cereal at all.

     Not me. My sweet tooth still works just fine.

     I know, I know, too much sugar is bad for you. Nobody should consume too many carbohydrates. I am fully cognizant of this. That's why, a couple of years ago, I gave up drinking soft drinks and went over to bottled water. (I strained my neck because I was patting myself on the back for being so good.)

     Then B got on my case because all those plastic bottles harm the environment. So now I reuse my plastic water bottles two or three times -- filling them up out of the tap -- before cracking open the next one.

     But I'm getting off topic. Halloween candy. All of our kids are grown up now and out of the house. But I still like greeting the little ones at the door and watching them dig into our bucket and come up with a couple of candy bars . . . and seeing the big smiles on their dirty faces.

     "You shouldn't let them grab," B scolds me.

     "Oh, come on," I parry. "It's Halloween. Let 'em grab for goodness sake."

Hey, who opened the candy?!?

     And I know . . . I remember, from my own childhood, the point is to collect as much candy as you can. You don't eat the half of it. The real fun is dumping out huge piles of candy on the floor after you get home, and sorting through looking for the good stuff, and maybe trading with your brothers and sisters. In the end, half of it goes stale and ends up in the garbage. Oh, I know it's a waste . . . bah humbug.

     Parents may roll their eyes, but I remember as a parent with young kids, I loved seeing the joy in their faces -- all this candy, it doesn't get better than this! Doesn't every kid deserve a moment like that?

     But still, as parents we do have to take some responsibility into our own hands. For example, a lot of kids have an allergic reaction to nuts. Can't let that happen. I'd better get those peanut M&Ms out of the bowl -- oh, and the Hershey bars, too!