"I can't be a pessimist, because I'm alive. To be a pessimist means that you have agreed that human life is an academic matter." -- James Baldwin

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Prostitution Legalized in New Jersey

     Sometimes we retired folks are faulted for always thinking that the world is going to hell in a handbasket. But sometimes it's just the plain truth.

     I hate to report to my friends in the rest of the country -- and I apologize in advance if anyone is offended -- but something is going on here in the east that is disturbing to a number of people. Yesterday, Gov. Chris Christie signed a bill into law legalizing prostitution in the state of New Jersey.

     The move was hailed by the Business Association of Greater Atlantic City. "Finally, we can offer a full-service entertainment package," said Tommy Manicotti, executive manager of the Boardwalk Hotel & Casino. "We will now have a hat trick -- gambling, alcohol and prostitution -- and we'll be able to compete head-to-head with the entertainment industry in Nevada. It's about time New Jersey entered the 21st century."

     The measure was opposed by several women's groups including the New Jersey chapters of NOW, Planned Parenthood and MADD. "It's an outrage," said Alice Meadows, executive director of Women in Business in Camden, NJ. "Prostitution is unsafe, unsound, and unsavory. And no matter what the governor or anyone else in Trenton says, prostitution exploits women and leaves them exposed to dangers too numerous to count."

     But the new law, called "The Women's Right to Control Their Own Bodies," did find some support among women in Atlantic City. Said Trixie Norton, manager of One Trick Pony Bar and Grill on Ventor Ave., "This will double my business. And I bet it will bring down the unemployment rate, too."

     Walt Stone, of Gay Pride Princeton, objected to the naming of the bill, pointing out that men can be prostitutes as well, although he went on to say that his organization supports gay sex in the context of a long-term, mutually respectful monogamous relationship.

     Some Democratic critics charge that Christie, a Republican, is trying to distract people from the Bridgegate scandal, although he did garner considerable backing for the bill from Democrats in the New Jersey state legislature. There was some support from out of state as well. Said former New York Governor Eliott Spitzer, "It makes perfect sense, because it will cut down the crime rate, free up police for more pressing activities, and mitigate overcrowding in New Jersey prisons."

     Former Congressman Anthony Weiner could not be reached for comment, but he is rumored to have tweeted: "My bad, you bad, we all bad," in a message that was taken to lend support for the new law.

     However, former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg released a statement opposing the bill. It said in part: "There is a well-established link between prostitution and smoking, and as such I cannot in good conscience support such a measure. In addition, I have already expressed my full-throated opposition to the Big Gulp."

     New Jersey state officials estimate that the law will bring in approximately $4 billion per year in direct expenditures, plus additional dollars for ancillary businesses such as bars and casinos. Since prostitution will be subject to the hospitality tax of 11%, instead of the normal sales tax of 7%, officials also estimate that legalizing prostitution will bring in over $400 million to state coffers, largely from out-of-state tourists. The money is targeted to improve health care and to help New Jersey schools fulfill common core requirements in sex education.

    John Fillbine, creator of the "I Love New York" campaign of the 1980s, who now lives in the tony suburb of Chatham, NJ, commented, "Let's get real. This is a long-overdue step away from hypocrisy, and toward giving New Jersey a much-needed leg up in the tourist business. After all, you can go to Colorado to get high. But now you can come to New Jersey to get laid."

    

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

When I got to the part with Anthony Weiner, I knew:

APRIL FOOL.

Good one Tom. For a moment, you had me going.

M.

stephen Hayes said...

I was getting all hot and bothered by this, wondering why this wasn't mentioned on the news, when I remembered the date. Ha ha! I'll save my inappropriate yet pithy response for another day.

DJan said...

Oh, I was so pissed as I read this and I too was taken in until I got to the Weiner part. You sure had me going! Congratulations on the best April Fools joke I've run across in years! :-)

#1Nana said...

Sorry, I'm not that gullible!

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Anonymous said...

Whatever! And time to stop treating this as a crime.

Unknown said...

I'd rather legalize gambling and sports betting haha
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Hauola said...

I was being reeled in on this one and for a good reason beyond April Fool's pranking. Days ago I suspended my satellite TV subscription for the allowed timeframe of 6 months. I read newspapers instead or look at news briefly on the web, but no evening news on any major network or the minor networks. With many a happening in NJ this was not an unbelievable turn of events. Casino businesses are booming and it lined up with that realm. Now for the next April Fool's celebration of those easily fooled I will be overly cautious.

Douglas said...

I suppose I will have to cancel my surreptitious trip to New Jersey now that it is revealed to be an April Fools joke.

Anonymous said...

I got it an april's fool joke, but with all the crap that the governor will get from that GW gate it really wasn't too far hatched..Hey in Nevada one can pay and get almost anything, why would one fly and or drive to New Jersey, garden state my ass?!!!!!! Ha Ha Ha !!!!!

gabbygeezer said...

There's no sales tax added in Vegas I'm told).

Unknown said...

Prostitution should be as available as McDonalds, for all sexual orientations. This is a natural and normal body function and should be available to all human beings, and women should not be the gender to say when there will be sex.

Linda Writer said...

Wow! You got me! ...and it's not even April Fool's Day. I read the title and then started reading the blog post and even made a grunting sound of disapproval, ahha ha!

Anonymous said...

Prostitution in NJ should be legalized in my opinion. It's the oldest profession, it could be controlled , licenses being issued, health cards etc. Locations could be carefully chosen not in residential areas, not near schools. No roaming the streets or in any public areas. Possible location might be a building in a industrial park after business hours. No drugs permitted , violence would not be tolerated. Reasonable prices and quality services. Workers and customers pay taxes

Unknown said...
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Unknown said...

Prostitution should legalized while law and regulation controlled by government to avoid serious social problem! Same as gambling!

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